When I was a young girl, I would not walk. I thought, why walk when you can run there? An hour took forever, a day dragged on and on. Even summer always seemed to last too long. But now that I'm grown , it's the days that run away. I walk at a leisurely pace. And the people I've known mostly haven't stayed Or when we pass in the street, we don't smile, we don't speak.
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in my heart)i am never without it(anywhere i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing,my darling) i fear no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true) and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide) and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
I just watched the last three episodes of One Tree Hill Season 5. AS ALWAYS-OTH makes my world stop. It just is magic for me. But I've got to say, some parts were dragging. You just like want to jump into the scene and like scream at the characters face- HEY WTH, WAKE UP! YOU'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT FOR LIKE FOREVER! WHY AREN'T YOU DOING ANYTHING??! Sorry, I really get carried away.
One Tree Hill makes me believe in love and all it's wonders. The Nathan-Haley love story is the fairytale I'd like to be in.
3 minutes after finishing the last episode- I was like "WHAT THE? TORTUREEE" I CAN'T WAIT FOR SEASON 6!!!!!
AND AS ALWAYS- GREAT SOUNDTRACK.
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My days are filled with mistakes Some that I didn’t make I carry them around Some people don’t feel a thing Some kind of blissful dream Wish I could live that now oh I wish I could live that now
Too early to say that I have indeed changed for the better.
Even though I slept late last night because of blogging, I managed to wake up by 6:00am to cook breakfast for my sister. Yes, I'm actually being her mom while I still can. Cooked Torta, serverd rice, orange juice, prepared her baon-OH HA! Mamang Mama!
I was supposed to go back to sleep but I reminded myself- no slacking! no slacking! SOoo, I took a bath to awaken my senses. Since then, until 3 in the afternoon I did all my chores and I mean ALL my chores. From watering the plants, to arranging my drawers, to vacuuming the whole entire house- I did every little thing on my 17 item to do list for today! OH HA! :)
I feel so much better. I realized how relieved I felt after crushing out the last thing on my list with much spare time to watch TV without the guilt.
Day 3 will be on Monday- my parents are here on weekends so I couldn't possibly call it self control- it would be more like they're watching so I have no choice kind of decision making.
Hearing the happiness from my mother's voice was enough gratification for me :)
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-DINNA GONZALES [2008] while watering the dried out backyard. :)
I have approximately 14minutes to finish this post, 10 days before school and 1 day before my parents come home.
Last Monday I got a whole lot of sermon since I left the house all messed up for the nth time. The internet was left on, the windows were open, my tried on clothes all over my bed, etc....- not really ideal things an 18 year old should forget. Since I still have a little more than a week before school, I am now SERIOUSLY taking action. I hate it when I make my parents mad and now I SERIOUSLY hope I will succeed. So, I have a seven day parole to prove how much I could change not only for my family, but of course for myself.
DAY 1
I had a long list of chores. I was off to a good start- - I cooked breakfast for my sister at 6am. (+3) - I went back to sleep and got up by 9. - Had Oatmeal for breakfast (yey) (+2) - Immediately washed the dishes then went to take a bath.(+1) So I decided to turn on my computer, often times a bad idea.(-3)
Well, well, it was. I started syncing photos to my ipod- we all know what happens next. Really, once you pop, you can't stop. More Like, once I pop, I can't stop.
12:30 Still not eating lunch- Still on the computer. (-2) My mom called me and reminded me of what I was supposed to be doing. I got scolded again, which really depressed me. I got angry with myself but I still continued completing the album artwork for my ipod. If only I could ask Santa for self control. I'd give up 5years of gifts under the tree- really.
It went on for hours. (-3) 5:00pm Mom called again. She was in a good mood. She was asking how I was and I was completely confused, then again it made me happy. I got determined so, I went to do some of the chores again.
-Threw away all the junk food which I no longer wanted (+1) -Placed all our stuff toys in a bag and kept it in the closet (+1) -Hid away our belen (+1)
I lost focus and I went off to customize my ipod. All these themes, and icons and pretty buttons- so many choices... I looked at the clock- 8:00pm (-3) My sister arrives from work by 8:10, uhoh. Hurriedly, I warmed the food and arranged the table. .. Sister arrives, only to find out that there was no ICECOLD water because I forgot to put the water bottle back in the refrigerator. My sister had to "talk"with me again.
Then It hit me... again..
I realized how tiring it was to get scolded over and over. It must feel worse to be the one who has to remind like every other hour or so. I really do not mean to hurt my family, so I am now determined more than ever to become a better person. STOP THE CYCLE!STOP THE CYCLE!STOP THE CYCLE!
So, I go superwoman! -Arranged the shelves in the kitchen and placed sticky mats on them.(+2) -Washed the dishes in record time.(+1) -Pushed out the trash.(+1)
Even though we slept late the night before, we woke up early the next day to make breakfast for our dad! :) After atending mass, we ate at Pinoy Bistro to celebrate Father's Day! Happy Fathers Day to my dad. I could never ask for more from a dad cause you truly are the best for me! :) Love you PA! :)
June 14, 2008 (June 15 sa Philippines) We surprised Joey today because Pam and I couldn't make it on Joey's real birthday- which is tomorrow because coincidentally it is Father's Day as well. Met up at Florence Station and bought cake and a balloon(HANNAH MONTANA by the way) at Gonzalez Super Market.
Arrived there by 9amish (12amish sa DAVAO, yiheee) We went up to his room, and then hooorah! Shock ka? HAHAHA I don't know who was more surprised, si Joey o kami. HAHAHA
The most short lived hang out of all time- 3hours. The three of us all had somewhere to go, soo so long. But I had loads of fun! I can't believe we had 105 photos in the span of 3hours! waaaah :D
SUPAH FRENDS :)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOEY! MADRIVE MO NA KAMI! HAHAHAHA HOPE WE MADE YOU SMILE. UYY. WAAH.
Yesterday I planned to write back to my friend. Yes write, not reply. Meaning to communicate with an old friend using traditional methods- that is with pen and paper. I also needed to go to the library to return the DVDs I borrowed two days ago.
So before heading out, I placed in my bag my G-Tec, some sheets of paper and the dvds. I decided to write the letter outside the house so the distraction of the internet and the television will be out of the picture.
By 2pm, I went out and rode the bus to the library. I slid the dvds in the video return box and walked 2 blocks to the nearest Starbucks. I thought that it would be a great place to write. So I bought a tall Vanilla Bean with whipped cream and sat outside. The bossa nova in the background was the perfect icing on top of the melancholic feel of the place. So I brought out my pen and my paper-I was ready to start writing. Then the wind started to blow. That agitated me because my hair was all over my face. I tried not minding it it since I was already there and didn't have any other place to go. So, I started writing the first few lines of my letter.
Dear Monica, (I laughed because it reminded me of this radio show I hated back when I was in Davao.) ..... After four lines, my hand started to ache. But still I continued. By the 6th line I realized how hideous my writing was slowly looking. On the second paragraph, I decided to review what I have already done. IT LOOKED LIKE WAVES ON A FAKE OCEAN WITH 13 FLOATING WOOD LOGS. I had no sense of a straight line WHATSOEVER. Still, I continued, explaining how authentic this letter was looking-crossed out words and spelling jelus (jealous) all wrong. hahaha Eventually I got to the end of one page and my hand hurt like hell. I decided to stop because it looked like a tornado messed up a whole entire city. I decided to continue the letter some other day.
I realized how long ago it was when I had to write something this long. I've been out of school for almost a year so the longest thing I have had to write in the last 8 months was my college application form. I guess my hand writing skills is all rusty now. I've been typing all this time that I forgot how my hand writing looked. Booo.
Anyway, I'm writing again soon! ;) I'm already enrolled at Cerritos College for summer classes. I have English 100 and Introduction to Anthropology for the next 2 months :) YEY. Naa na koy pulos usab sa mundo according to Lanzi. haha :)
Now that I'm living with my parents, they now see who I really am- all my flaws, mistakes and of course my loveliness. haha I really am far from perfect and I admit that. I lived with my brother for almost 4 years. So, I was the boss of myself. I did whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. Everything in my daily itinerary revolved around what I felt like doing and not around what I am supposed to be doing. I didn't prioritize. I overslept. I oversurfed(if there is such a word) the net. But I was never a bad girl, more like I was always TAMAD.
Now that I'm with my parents, MY WAY ISN'T WORKING FOR THEM. My parents are responsible beings and they are pushing me to change my ways. I believe old habits die hard. So there-my dad jokes that he would send me to rehab because I am so helpless.
"He tried to make me go to rehab, I said no, no, noo!" haha
But I'm trying, trying really hard. I believe I've accomplished some things in 8 months. 1. I wake up no later than 9am! :) 2. I take a bath first thing after bed even though I'm just staying home all day. 3. I eat more fruits now! ha! 4. Hmm.. Mmm... ?..
Okey, that's all I can think for now. Three done 2,346,524,350 more to go! :P
"...Kaya eto, sa aking sariling paraan, ipinagdidiwang ko ang araw na ito sa pamamagitan nang pag blog sa kaunaunahang pagkakataon sa salitang Tagalog."
MALIGAYANG ARAW NANG KALAYAAN MGA KABABAYAN! :)
Ako ay Pilipino. Ang Pilipino ay ako.
Taas noo kong ipinagmamalaki ang ating bansa, ating mga kababayan at ang ating kultura. Walay jam.
Nagsimba kami sa St. Pius noong nakaraang linggo mga alas dose nang hapon. Natutuwa talaga ako kapag doon kami nagsisimba pagkat ang dami-dami kong nakikkita na mga kababayan. Nabibigyan ako nang paniniwalang parang hindi ako umalis kahit sa saglit na sandali lamang. Madalas, Pilipino rin ang nagbabasa nang una at pangalawang pagbasa. Kung ako ay maswerte, may mga pagkakataon pa nga na Pilipino din ang "choir". Ang sarap nang pakiramdam pag dating nang parte kung saan kinakanta na nila ang "Kordero Nang Diyos". Tumataas talaga ang balahibo ko at tila binabalik ako sa mga Linggo sa loob nang simbahan nang San Pablo sa Juna Subdivision, Matina, Davao City, alas sais nang gabi.
Dahil ika-12 na nang Junyo bukas, at sa Pilipinas ngayon ay kasalukuyang nagaganap ang ARAW NANG KALAYAAN may isang pangyayaring hindi ko inaasahan noong araw na yun..
Natapos na ang huling kanta sa misa ngunit itinuloy pa ring nang pianista ang pagtugtug. Dahan-dahan nang naglalabasan ang mga tao. Bago pa man kami makatayo sa aming inuupuan, sinimulan nang choir ang pagkanta nang Ako ay Pilipino.
Doon talaga ako kinilabutan. Nakita ko na ang mga naiwan na lang sa loob nang simbahan ay ang mga Pinoy. Habang patuloy ang choir, dahan-dahan na ding nakisali ang mga nakakaalam sa mga salita at tila may naririnig akong pagasam sa mga tinig na lumalabas sa kanilang mga bibig. Naramdaman ko na galing sa puso ang lahat nang naririnig ko. Sigurado ako dahil ito sa malaking parte nang pagkatao nila na naiwan nila sa Pilipinas. Sigurado ako dahil malaking parte nang pagkatao ko ang naiwan ko sa Pilipinas.
Kanina ay sinabi sa akin nang kapatid ko "Huy! Happy Independence Day! 12 na didto!". Sabi ko, "O diay noh! Halaaa!"( Oo nga pala noh."). Pagkatapos ay sabi niya "Uy! Magbutang na ta ug flag!"("Maglagay na tayo nang bandila") Pagkatapos non naisip ko na lang bigla, Paano ko ba talaga pinahahalagahan ang araw na ito noon? Halos hindi ko na nga maala, nang biglang ..Aaaah "Yes, Walay Klase!"(Yes! Walang Klase!"). Ayun! Ang weird isipin na kung kelan ang konti lang nang paraan para magsaya at magdiwang, ngayon ko pa naisip kung gaano pala kaimportante ang araw na ito. Kaya eto, sa aking sariling paraan, ipinagdidiwang ko ang araw na ito sa pamamagitan nang pag blog sa kaunaunahang pagkakataon sa salitang Tagalog.
...Itutuloy.
Pangalawang Yugto: Ika-12 nang Junyo- dito..
Tagalog nang Atenistang taga Davao: Kaweird nang tagalog ko. hahahaha One year na kasi ako hindi nakasulat nang mga essay na tagalog ba. Parang kahirap maghanap nang salita. Wah NOSEBLEED. Wla pa dyud dictionary.com para mag tulong! hahaha YUGTO! OH HA!! hahaha. Pero sure na ko na kadami ko wrong grammar, cge n lng. Diba kita ang effort. haha
I feel like singing sad songs all night. I feel like tuning you out. Do you want to make it in to more of a fight? Is this yelling what love’s all about?
So go on, and tear me apart. Yeah just go on in straight for my chest and maybe it’s mostly my fault. Because if I’m the only girl you ever had I guess I can’t be the best. Can’t be the best
And I feel like falling asleep while you scream. I feel like tuning you out. Do you want to stand up and make a big scene? Put the lid down, pick up the dog shit, and shut your mouth
1. School is closed on Fridays- Call first before traveling 14 miles. The door won't bust open no matter how hard you try. And If by any chance it does, there will be no one there.
2. When visiting Pam, don't leave home at rush hour- Standing for 27minutes is not really ideal.
3. Don't sit alone drinking infinite orange juice outside Robeks Juice- A kababayan may actually approach and ask if you're feeling homesick.
4. I can help save planet earth one littered plastic cup at a time- When seeing feeling COOL rude skater kids throwing their Star Bucks iced tea by the flowers, pick it up myself.
5. Always beware of the time-Even though the sun is still up- it can actually be 8 in the evening.
6. If you want to experience LA, ride the train at night- there can never be too much action every time. My 1hour, 16mins, and 4 seconds train ride home experience in a nutshell. --While at Platform 1 waiting for the train: Scary Emo Kid standing at corner.
--Look the other way- a man doing push ups.
--On the train: met a Tagalog speaking African American. Apparently he's been in more places in the Philippines than I have. (Bohol, Palawan, Ilocos.........)
--Saw 2 teenage rival cliques riding the same train on one of the stops. There was screaming and definitely some pulling. One got pushed off the train.
--On another one of the stops, a singing man rides the train. It was pleasing to the ears, fortunately.
--Two seats away from me I see a woman "crying" over the phone. One man says "I don't know what's worst, the fight that almost happened or the crocodile tears behind me."
7. Don't leave LA later than 8 pm-house is 1 hour and 16 minutes away.- thus dark and there will be running involved.
8. Don't write at 11:54 pm, I will most probably miss my "I will sleep before 12" birthday resolution.
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RANDOM:
When I got home my sister was watching OTH season 3 finale on the internet. I just wanna share a line that Brooke quoted in the episode for her speech at Haley and Nathan's wedding.
"Love is not love which alter when an alteration finds, when life gets hard when things change, true love remains the same." -Shakespeare.
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FAVORITESST SONG FROM GREGORY & THE HAWK
"I guess it doesn't matter what I say or what I seem.
You stuck what I felt for you in the pocket of your jeans. Ignoring me the morning after isn't enough and I swear I'm gonna cry. I'm sick of tryin' to be tough."
